proof positive
That I'm deep-down quite introverted. Maybe not like quiet/shy/agoraphobic introverted, but nonetheless: after a social and action-packed weekend, I basically took all day today to kind of decompress.
The weekend: WARNING - TRIPTYCH
-Dinner in Central with the HK Language and Cultural Exchange Group, which I found out about through Ramon and has become a point-of-contact into meeting new people here. The turnout at events is very good (~40), and there's always a mix of people I've met before and new people. This was followed by a (no door charge) visit to Beijing Club, the newest hotspot in Lan Kwai Fong. While the street-level bar scene there is pretty drunk-expat-laden and not all that pleasant, the members-only danceclubs have a lot more local people, more young people, and better music. Which meant it got really crowded and loud by like 2, so I left around 2:30 and got home a little before 4.
-Saturday morning I had to work. I spent part of the afternoon talking with Steph online about basketball and politics (*nostalgic sigh for college, when the marriage of such topics was common*), and then headed out to visit Jane, Dan, and Andy in Soho around dinnertime. I later met up with a friend from Budapest who happened to be in town, and we got Korean fried chicken and beer at the Korean bar in TST.
-Sunday, I met a friend from the Exchange group for dimsum in Tai Po (she grew up in the area), and then we went to a Serious Language Exchange event. I ended up spending the better part of two hours listening to Mandarin spoken between HK locals, Singaporeans, and a Mainland Chinese member of the group who had most graciously volunteered to walk us through some conversation practice. There were frequent pauses when everyone else checked with me to see if I was following what was going on (uh, sorta, most of the time), and I even attempted to relate a couple anecdotes. If I heard correctly, during Spring Festival here, it's ok (if you are unmarried) to visit couples you know are married just to ask for a red envelope. I'm kind of excited about this practice, although I don't know many married couples. Maybe we could arrange a "bring-your-spouse-to-work-day" around this time... Also, I found out that when signs in stores say "買一送一", the 送 actually means "give away", because the sign is speaking from the store's perspective. I always just just got the "buy one, get one" translation, and thought it had to do with receiving.
The language exchange was followed by bowling, which I turned out to have completely muscle-forgotten (or whatever the opposite of muscle memory is), but that's ok, because it was all in fun, right? And then a big group dinner, which included some Peking duck. All of Sundays events were subsidized by the HK government, because they were held at the HK Police Recreation Club (of which one of our members is concurrently a member in very good standing). Their facilities were extremely nice!
END TRIPTYCH
So yeah, it was a whirlwind and I didn't take enough photos, failed to get anything off my to-do list done, etc etc. A blast, for sure. I'm still picking up the pieces, facebook-request-wise! But tiring. Today I: woke up with my alarm, thought about it, and reset it for like an hour and a half later; got lunch, played around with the internet and let lunch get cold; taught primary school kids for an hour; played around with the internet and thought idly about the work I have to do this week; got a little dinner on campus; played some Tecmo Super Bowl; listened to Sondre Lerche's "Human Hands" like fifteen times; read a little. Generally avoided human contact. A recovery day, basically, though since I didn't do any drinking nor even really stay out very late yesterday, recover from what?
From socializing, I think. Some of the people in the Exchange group just seem naturals at meeting people / networking / being social / knowing what to do and say to make people feel comfortable. I think I've made a lot of progress in this department since the beginning of the year, say, when I just kind of mumbled and looked uncomfortable and tried to figure out if any of the women were checking me out (they weren't). But it's still hard--every social rule I learn, like business card exchange, leads to another rule-governed situation I know NOTHING about and just seems intimidating (a follow-up call?). Eek. Ick. It's just a lot to learn/practice, a lot to kind of keep in mind when you're just trying to talk to people. I'd like to think I'm now reasonably able to get by in group social settings with adults with completely humiliating myself, but I'm a long long ways away from where the real Type-A Extroverts are, the sort of people who gain energy from meeting new people and making introductions and arranging things. Phew. I still come running back afterwards to one of the several books I'm reading, to the small but fortunately semi-private space of my dorm room.
I don't know, frankly, what my goal is. Am I polishing social skills because I think one of the people I meet will get me a job offer somehow? Am I trying to forcibly change myself into a Type-A? If so, why did I spend ten minutes at dinner yesterday explaining my math thesis to a non-math person? That can't have been that interesting. Aiyah, with the in-person meeting I've been doing, I've fallen behind in email correspondence (again). As I said numerous numerous times recently (esp when visiting Andy and Jane), "Being an adult is difficult!" As it gets slightly more manageable, though, the question becomes, "So I can fake being an adult for a couple hours. What do I do now?"
The weekend: WARNING - TRIPTYCH
-Dinner in Central with the HK Language and Cultural Exchange Group, which I found out about through Ramon and has become a point-of-contact into meeting new people here. The turnout at events is very good (~40), and there's always a mix of people I've met before and new people. This was followed by a (no door charge) visit to Beijing Club, the newest hotspot in Lan Kwai Fong. While the street-level bar scene there is pretty drunk-expat-laden and not all that pleasant, the members-only danceclubs have a lot more local people, more young people, and better music. Which meant it got really crowded and loud by like 2, so I left around 2:30 and got home a little before 4.
-Saturday morning I had to work. I spent part of the afternoon talking with Steph online about basketball and politics (*nostalgic sigh for college, when the marriage of such topics was common*), and then headed out to visit Jane, Dan, and Andy in Soho around dinnertime. I later met up with a friend from Budapest who happened to be in town, and we got Korean fried chicken and beer at the Korean bar in TST.
-Sunday, I met a friend from the Exchange group for dimsum in Tai Po (she grew up in the area), and then we went to a Serious Language Exchange event. I ended up spending the better part of two hours listening to Mandarin spoken between HK locals, Singaporeans, and a Mainland Chinese member of the group who had most graciously volunteered to walk us through some conversation practice. There were frequent pauses when everyone else checked with me to see if I was following what was going on (uh, sorta, most of the time), and I even attempted to relate a couple anecdotes. If I heard correctly, during Spring Festival here, it's ok (if you are unmarried) to visit couples you know are married just to ask for a red envelope. I'm kind of excited about this practice, although I don't know many married couples. Maybe we could arrange a "bring-your-spouse-to-work-day" around this time... Also, I found out that when signs in stores say "買一送一", the 送 actually means "give away", because the sign is speaking from the store's perspective. I always just just got the "buy one, get one" translation, and thought it had to do with receiving.
The language exchange was followed by bowling, which I turned out to have completely muscle-forgotten (or whatever the opposite of muscle memory is), but that's ok, because it was all in fun, right? And then a big group dinner, which included some Peking duck. All of Sundays events were subsidized by the HK government, because they were held at the HK Police Recreation Club (of which one of our members is concurrently a member in very good standing). Their facilities were extremely nice!
END TRIPTYCH
So yeah, it was a whirlwind and I didn't take enough photos, failed to get anything off my to-do list done, etc etc. A blast, for sure. I'm still picking up the pieces, facebook-request-wise! But tiring. Today I: woke up with my alarm, thought about it, and reset it for like an hour and a half later; got lunch, played around with the internet and let lunch get cold; taught primary school kids for an hour; played around with the internet and thought idly about the work I have to do this week; got a little dinner on campus; played some Tecmo Super Bowl; listened to Sondre Lerche's "Human Hands" like fifteen times; read a little. Generally avoided human contact. A recovery day, basically, though since I didn't do any drinking nor even really stay out very late yesterday, recover from what?
From socializing, I think. Some of the people in the Exchange group just seem naturals at meeting people / networking / being social / knowing what to do and say to make people feel comfortable. I think I've made a lot of progress in this department since the beginning of the year, say, when I just kind of mumbled and looked uncomfortable and tried to figure out if any of the women were checking me out (they weren't). But it's still hard--every social rule I learn, like business card exchange, leads to another rule-governed situation I know NOTHING about and just seems intimidating (a follow-up call?). Eek. Ick. It's just a lot to learn/practice, a lot to kind of keep in mind when you're just trying to talk to people. I'd like to think I'm now reasonably able to get by in group social settings with adults with completely humiliating myself, but I'm a long long ways away from where the real Type-A Extroverts are, the sort of people who gain energy from meeting new people and making introductions and arranging things. Phew. I still come running back afterwards to one of the several books I'm reading, to the small but fortunately semi-private space of my dorm room.
I don't know, frankly, what my goal is. Am I polishing social skills because I think one of the people I meet will get me a job offer somehow? Am I trying to forcibly change myself into a Type-A? If so, why did I spend ten minutes at dinner yesterday explaining my math thesis to a non-math person? That can't have been that interesting. Aiyah, with the in-person meeting I've been doing, I've fallen behind in email correspondence (again). As I said numerous numerous times recently (esp when visiting Andy and Jane), "Being an adult is difficult!" As it gets slightly more manageable, though, the question becomes, "So I can fake being an adult for a couple hours. What do I do now?"
posted by sam at
11:20 PM
1 Comments:
Hi Sam, you are a great writer!
I can tell you had fun with the HKCLEC... I do too! hehehe
Let's exchange points of view next time ; )
Take care,
Amai
By
Anonymous, at 1/23/08, 1:39 PM
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